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Black Watch Kilt

by Julia Douglass

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1.
it’s not nice and neat don’t go down mainstreet or bother with the boulevard on blacktop two miles don’t take a left on gravel with sun in your eyes you’ve got love as the crow flies The upcoming exhibit of Quaker quilts you can’t wait to tell him your step has a lilt it’s not an affair you think with a laugh it’s just that your real life husband doesn’t like crafts the crow flies the crow flies you’ve got love as the crow flies the crow flies the crow flies you've got love as the crow flies His ornate alchemy is ionic his messy charisma is messianic it’s not your fault Walt is your gestalt you’ve got love as the crow flies so high in the sky no traffic jams goes wherever it wants high in the sky just goes wherever it wants
2.
Sorry to let you know this way Didn’t have your number something happened today and we couldn’t find a black watch kilt for her so she’s wearing navy blue I remember visiting the two of you at Middlebrook Hall never knew what you’d be up to after class, you both the same, dancing around to 'Your So Vain' wearing navy blue little Annie found her by the stairs we think five hundred people will be there she’ll be laid to rest at the Fort, you know the one, by the airport wearing navy blue we’ve looked and looked for it everywhere a black watch kilt we know that’s what she would want to wear but we’re running out of time, really hope she doesn’t mind that she’s wearing navy blue
3.
Alice 03:22
What do you want me to do Alice, do, Alice, do What do you want me to do, Alice, do, Alice, do you want me to have some great career Alice, some great career then your mad I'm never here never, Didn’t turn out the way we thought it would still Alice what we’ve got is good what we've got is good Didn’t turn out the way we thought it would still Alice what we’ve got is good don’t like how I take care of the kid, Alice, I do more than my dad ever did than my dad ever did ever did you’re mad that he’s just sitting in there, Alice in his playpen he’s supposed to be practicing his violin but he’s only nine months, maybe ten everyone knows you’re smarter than me you’re the one whose got that degree you were the one who was supposed to go light up the world go light up the world
4.
Funny Voices 04:09
give me one more chance I can be like her good with money quote more from the Dow give me one more chance I can be like her be a mystic quote more from the Tao but does she talk in funny voices? tell you your boss is an idiot? Does she read to you from Playboy when you’re driving on road trips? give me one more chance I can be like her have people give me nicknames such as "lyric" give me one more chance I can be like her I'll take no prisoners my battles are pyhrric but does she talk in funny voices? tell you your boss is an idiot? does she read to you from Playboy when you’re driving on road trips? give me one more chance I can be like her give me one more chance I'll get us front row seats give me one more chance to hear an evening of Keats give me one more chance does she talk in funny voices? tell you your boss is an idiot? does she read to you from Playboy when you’re driving on road trips?
5.
My boyfriend oh he’s a genius it’s hard for him to be in this world I’m lucky just to be his girl To be girlfriend of a genius My boyfriend he likes me around Because I’m funny I’m the clown I make him laugh I make him smile I make him Genius my boyfriend is a Genius My boyfriend his friends all revere him It’s a thrill just to be near him To be close by his side To be along just for the ride To be in circles of Genius My boyfriend is a Genius My boyfriend is sometimes unkind to me But that’s because his mind you see Is special he is brilliant he is smarter Than everyone else it’s hard for him He gets so bored to socialize is such a chore He is different he’s unique he belongs to the minds’ elite Cause he’s a genius My boyfriend oh he’s a genius
6.
"When the driver is hammered and you find you're two hours away No Questions Asked I'll come get you." He meant to say to his son that day He says it when he visits over and over until dark its pretty there where he lays down flowers so pretty you'd think that you were in a park No questions asked No questions asked No questions asked No questions asked he says it all the time now under his breath again and again if you're walking by you would swear you would swear that you could hear him say No questions asked No questions asked No questions asked No questions asked Friday evenings round town now teenagers all roll their eyes fathers lay the law down and mothers start to cry

credits

released January 11, 2014

Produced by Andy Thompson

All songs written by Julia Douglass, except "No Questions Asked" written by Julia Douglass & Andy Thompson

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Julia Douglass Minneapolis, Minnesota

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